ProcrastiNation. The Epidemic.

Super Panda here, on a typical Tuesday afternoon. So, instead of studying for those paramount advanced placement exams like a diligent little pupil, I opt to.. create a new post on my blog!

Warning: The following material may be unsatisfying and or useless to those wishing to peruse a text that has a point. Repeat. This entry has no significant purport. Again. RANTING. Read at your own risk >:D

Sometimes I wonder. Why should I exert all my efforts on maintaining those slightly above average grades? Will I truly benefit from these endeavors in the future? And even if that's true, I'll always be working towards the next "big step," won't I? Whether that regards summer vacation, graduation, college, marriage, job promotion, kids, etc.. I will always be anticipating something, right?

But WHY?! I should stop this now, before it goes too far. Just pick up my backpack and eagerly begin my trek around the world. I would have the opportunity to experience a hodgepodge of culture soup, what I have always dreamed about and longed for (you see, I just ended my sentence with a preposition.. so this clearly is not a scholarly entry, either. oh, boo).

I just want all this mess to end! And I am completely aware how emo I sound right now. I am very proud of my ability to voice my emo-ness, thank you very much. So, to drown out my sorrows, I shirk off my schoolwork in preferment of posting a blog entry to a world that is much too self-absorbed to concern themselves with the woes of an obsolete and seriously insignificant little rambling girl. Aack.

But what can I say that would atone this dreadful tirade that you, poor reader, have just suffered through? How about a joke! I recently purchased a delectable package of my favorite ice cream pops.. Scribbles! Which not only provide nourishment for my parched, Sahara-esque mouth, but also a witty antic on each stick! Hoorah! Anywhoo, the latest chic shenanigans.

What has two banks but no money? A river!

Quite distasteful slash crummy slash cheesy. I don't care.

What did the judge name his daughter? Sue!

What bird is always sad? (you HAD to have seen this coming..) A bluebird!

Finally, why did the chicken cross the road?

Answer: She didn't, being a teenage chick who just wanted to yell at the world and was too lazy and procrastinate-y to shift her feathery masses ten feet to the right.

Okay, so obviously that was a lame attempt on my part to elicit a wittle smile from the reader. Did I filfull my hopes?? :D

Oh don't worry. I'm not going crazy.. I swear! Besides, isn't this the normal teenage activity? At least, one that doesn't transgress any moral code. Hahah.

Boohoo. Pity me, poor me. Please. I'm a teenager and the world is ending. Let me write some very oppressing, Poe poetry in a dark corner. And bite my fingernails to bits.

RAWR. That would be my pathetic attempt to appear ferocious and intimidating. I even put it in all caps.. did you notice that? -whimper-

I'm procrastinating so much right now I am even too lazy to finish my train of thought. Perhaps I'll conclude it another time.. but truthfully?

Don't hold your breath.

No Lazy Vegetables Here

I call him.. Bubba.

I'm actually pretty surprised I managed to get a photo on here.

Computer savvy? Not me :)

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As high school students, we realize the need to impress. Not only our peers, but also the teachers who will hopefully write wonderfully complimentary recommendations to colleges and the prestigious colleges themselves. The battle to be the best brings out a competitive side that we never knew we had in us. Many a time have I overheard a conversation where somebody has just realized they have one more competitor to add to their list.
“Oh.. Jill got a 96 on her test? Wow, she beat me.”
And then come the vicious verbal attacks. Imagine a lion attacking that poor gazelle on national geographic, except with words.
“Well.. I beat her on the last test. She’s not really smart, I bet she just got lucky. Yeah.. I always thought she was stupid. This test grade is a total surprise, coming from her.”

The competition is crazy and frenetic. It’s what drives us on at two in the morning when we’re just about to give up on our lab report, but we don’t because then we know that we can’t beat Mr. What’s-His-Face who amazingly got a hundred on his last test when he didn’t even study.

Through my experiences, I’ve noticed that it’s best for me to avoid answering questions about grades when asked. My typical response to a “whadjaget?” is “a grade.” Truthful, yet evasive.

And of course, there’s those three letters that continually haunt every junior’s mind. SAT.
The SAT is obviously harder to study for than a simple math test. It takes time, patience and sometimes money, which some parents are willing to give barrelfuls of just so their child can add an extra hundred points to their SAT score.
But what does this test prove anyways? It doesn’t have anything to do with school. My knowledge of the innards of a frog did not help on test day. Nor did the information I have on war tactics of the American Revolution come into play. Mitosis? Proofs? Genghis Khan? Nope, nope, and nope.

We’re always on the lookout for ways to boost our grades, too. Extra credit?? Oh, please! It seems that we’re no longer being ourselves anymore, but actually attempting to mold ourselves into the perfect scholar, hoping that colleges won’t see through our thin façade before it breaks and we’re back to being “normal.” Juniors tend to be the ones who load up on APs and extracurricular activities, most of which we can’t handle in addition to our busy lives. The solution? We DON’T have lives. Those who are shooting for Ivy League schools dismiss going to the mall as unnecessary and instead choose to finish their riveting study guide.

But this competition is ironic as well. How many high school students have pulled an all-nighter on a project assigned a long ways back? Obviously this competition doesn’t prevent us from procrastinating. As long as the project’s done on time, it’s fine.

Competition doesn’t merely apply to frazzled teenagers, though. What with the ongoing economic depression, adults are desperately attempting to maintain their grasp (however feeble) on their jobs. The job may not pay well, it may not be satisfying, but it’s a job. My mom’s company recently had its fifth cutback last month. One woman, in desperation to keep her job, told the HoneyBaked administration that she was pregnant and this job was the only thing preventing her from being kicked out from her home and onto the streets. Turns out it was a lie. She wasn’t pregnant; she didn’t even have a boyfriend. This just goes to show how some Americans are willing to participate in deception just so they can bring the bacon home one more day.

But although competition breeds ugliness, it’s also our motivation. We’re always looking for the next big thing, whether it’s winter vacation, college, or (finally) a time to relax with the family. Without something to look forward to, what would be our impetus? Why would we go that extra mile? It’s our constant competition with one another that always pushes us to be better, to be faster, to be stronger. Without it, we’d just be a bunch of lazy vegetables.

Hello Ladies and Germs

Why, hello there. You, lucky blogger, have just stumbled upon my blog.

So.. introductions. Usually, I don't feel like I know a person until they clue me in on a little bit of their present situation, or history. Unfortunately, this is a public blog. And unfortunately, I'm a little paranoid. So you'll just have to gather your info on this blogger from my posts. And whoopie! Another one is coming soon to a computer near you. But I trust you to be a smart blogger. Who knows? I may accidentally leak too many little tidbits about my life that in a while you might just figure out exactly which city I live in and the number of my apartment/cottage/house/dorm room/shack. In that case, I'll just have to be sure and always keep one eye open when sleeping.

Chat to you soon,
Super Panda.